2015年7月开始承担新加坡静思花道种子老师，薛淑如以一颗欢喜心，将自己所学与学员分享。 摄 / 王素真
Eleven years ago, Xue Shu Ru from Taiwan came to Singapore, accompanying her children who were studying here. Since then, the seeds she had planted in the Tzu Chi Foundation (Taiwan) had the opportunity to develop further in the Lion City. Her love for flowers led her to sign up for Tzu Chi Singapore’s Jing Si Flower Arrangement Class, from where she embarked on a journey of spiritual growth and fulfilment. In July 2015, she became an instructor of the Flower Arrangement Class. Walking the path of a Tzu Chi bodhisattva, Xue derives great joy from her undertaking.
Keen to Avoid Mundane Defilements, Yet One Suffers
Xue has known about Tzu Chi since her younger days in Taiwan and greatly admired the volunteers dressed in their blue and white uniforms. However, she did not have the opportunity to be introduced into the organization by any Tzu Chi volunteer. At that time, she thought to herself that even if one hoped to do a good deed, it was not easy for the opportunity to arise. A few years later, Xue finally got to realize her wish and became a Tzu Chi donating member. Feeling that a celebration was due, she invited a few friends to an expensive hilltop restaurant and spent NT800 (about $35) per head to mark the joyous occasion.
When she was still living in Taiwan, for over ten years, Xue made regular donations for charity to Tzu Chi but did not consider joining the ranks of volunteers. It was partly because, as she put it, she was “afraid of people matters,” as disagreements have a tendency to arise from a gathering of many people. A nature lover, she preferred to spend her time leisurely exploring the outdoors.
In the early days of her marriage, Xue’s husband, Gao Cong Min, held a stable job. In addition he was honest and cared for the family, and this made Xue feel very fortunate. After a year of uneventful married life, Gao started his own business and was very busy day in and day out. The couple seldom got to see each other and they gradually grew apart.
Feeling that life was boring, she engaged in cross-stitch to pass the time and soon, her home was filled with her many craft work items. She recounted laughingly that in her Taipei home was a nine-metre long handiwork of hers; she had worked on it while tears rolled down her face. Looking back upon the unhappy past, she felt that then, she did not know how to communicate with her husband and was too preoccupied with her own resentment.
A Love of Flowers Leads to Joy in Giving
Once, Xue bought a bouquet of flowers while out shopping and having placed it in a vase in the hall, found that she derived joy from looking at it. Since then, she developed a love for the art of flower arrangement and subsequently signed up for a flower arrangement course with her friend.
Xue’s senior from high school, Zhong Li Zhu, recommended her to take up culinary, craft and psychology lessons at Fu Jen Catholic University in Taipei. During this period of taking up self-improvement courses, Xue had time to reflect on the way she communicated with her husband and realized that she often spoke with a sharp tongue, which affected their relationship.
The Gao family subsequently decided to send their two older sons to Singapore for studies in 2002 but two years later, Xue discovered that without her by their side, her children took on some negative traits. This made her decide to uproot herself and settle down in Singapore with her sons and baby daughter, who was just a year and eight months old then.
After moving to Singapore, Xue met Tzu Chi volunteer Qiu Min Hui at an MRT station by chance one day, and it was only then she discovered that there was a local branch of Tzu Chi in the city state. A few days later, she accepted Qiu’s invitation to visit the Jing Si Hall in Pasir Ris and signed up for the flower arrangement course there. As her daughter was still very young, Xue could not attend the course regularly. However, the day after her daughter was finally enrolled into Primary One, Xue eagerly visited Jing Si Hall where she was received by volunteer Ke Li Ming, whose children are living overseas, too. After she had chatted like old friends with Ke for an entire afternoon, Xue joyfully embarked upon her path as a Tzu Chi volunteer.
Spiritual Realization and Growth
Xue has always perceived herself as a “soft” character who would run at the first sign of confrontation. When she first became a volunteer, she would help out when needed, on condition that she was not the person in charge. Just like a flower arrangement where filler flowers and leaves can be added to complement the focal flowers, Xue felt that helping others achieve their goals made her happy; she was satisfied just being a “filler flower”.
The art of flower arrangement proved to be the turning point in Xue’s path as a Tzu Chi volunteer. In 2013, she returned to Taiwan to attend a Jing Si Flower Arrangement learning camp organized by Tzu Chi. During the lesson where students were taught “The Beauty of Quietude,” after Xue had carefully put her focal flower in place, she noticed that there was not much space left in her arrangement for filler flowers and leaves. At that moment, she was struck by the realization that with the vast numbers of volunteers and capable individuals in Tzu Chi, there might not be space for her if she wished only to be one of the “complementary blooms” at the sidelines.
Flower arrangement instructor Li Xiu Jing’s sharing, too, played a part in awakening more emotions in Xue. Like Xue, in her younger days, Li felt inner emptiness while her husband was busy with his career. She eventually found fulfilment in doing flower arrangement.
During the camp, Xue also saw elderly volunteers carrying their grandchildren with them as they helped out. This made her feel ashamed and she pondered if she could do more. In the rush of emotions and tears which clouded her vision, her mind was suddenly made up. After she returned to Singapore, she made a call to her community volunteer leader and conveyed her willingness to be a certified commissioner of Tzu Chi. That very year, Xue obtained her wish and was successfully certified.
In the past, being just “an observer from the outside”, Xue could not clearly perceive how Tzu Chi could benefit one in one’s spiritual cultivation. She would also tend to shun those who did not share the same views as her. However, after becoming a certified commissioner in 2013 and having received the blessings from Master Cheng Yen, her perspective changed.
“In Tzu Chi, we all try our best to work in harmony with one another. The more trials we experience and overcome, the purer our minds will become. There are those who come to test you, and they are the ones who help you develop further in your spiritual practice,” shared Xue. She has now come to realize that first and foremost, one must cultivate oneself by purifying one’s own heart, not by correcting or changing others.
Xue is an all-rounder in the community; she conducts house visits to the needy, engages in recycling and is a community volunteer team leader. As her team members all have different temperaments and come from different backgrounds, she uses different methods to guide and communicate with them in order to maintain team harmony.
During the community activities, Xue who has a deft hand in the kitchen, often treats her co-volunteers to her handmade confections as she believes that building positive affinities with others facilitates her in carrying out her undertakings. Grateful for all the opportunities to take on responsibilities, Xue feels that the more she involves herself in Tzu Chi’s work, the happier and more upbeat she is.
If Xue were not active in Tzu Chi, she would not have been able to cultivate purity of heart. She firmly remembers the words of Master Cheng Yen: “One must carefully contemplate the Dharma that one has heard. If one only listens without seeking to understand, that will be a waste of the opportunity in joining Tzu Chi!”
Xue noticed that after the focal flower was in place, there was not much space left in her arrangement for filler flowers and leaves. This made her realize that with the vast numbers of talented volunteers in Tzu Chi, she should step out of the shadows to undertake heavier responsibilities. (Photo by Teh Siau Tong)
Xue is pictured here at the Serangoon Tzu Chi recycling point promoting earth-friendly Jing Si lifestyle products to residents. (Photo by Wu Zhen Zhou)
Despite suffering from serious inflammation of her joints, Xue (right) still joined the Tzu Chi street fundraiser for the Nepal earthquake disaster, donning protective knee and waist guards so that she could stand for long hours. (Photo by Lee Beng Hwee)
Xue also conducts healthy vegetarian cooking classes at Tzu Chi. (Photo by Jacelyn Png)
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